EVERYTHING CHANGES

As the seasons turn, we are reminded of the ever-evolving nature of life. Nothing stays the same–at least not for very long. It always blows me away how you can think you have everything figured out, and in an instant you can feel like you are living in a different lifetime. Lately, I have taken a lot of time to reflect on the changes in the last few months. I revisited my goals and reevaluated what was important to me. 

I tried planning. Last week I went to visit an academic adviser. When I first made the appointment I intended to talk about my plans to double major and how these plans conflicted with my desire to study abroad in college. I spent a couple hours the night before the appointment sifting through the course guide, and trying to envision what my next couple years in college would look like. Eventually I became overwhelmed. I started to realize that maybe, just maybe, I was getting a little ahead of myself. I could no longer justify my reasoning behind wanting to double major. A few months ago I decided to study TV and film, and Strategic Communications (PR, advertising, etc.). In my heart all I want is to work in TV or film production, but my head was telling me that I needed something more. I needed this super, dual degree that would allow me more flexibility (you know, in case the whole making movies thing doesn’t work out). As I sat at my desk, drowning in my fears, I decided I need to talk it over with someone. I called my mom, and she reminded me of what she has told me from the beginning: she doesn’t think I should double major.

So I walked into this advising appointment last Thursday, wondering what I was really there for. I already knew the answers to my questions in my heart. But verbalizing them made it real. I talked about my fears and my dreams, and what I was already doing to achieve my goals. The adviser smiled at me, and she told me that as I was talking about working in film and TV, that I was beaming, and she could tell how much it excited me. She said that college students can have this idea of needing 4 or 5 majors to be able to really market themselves, but that it wasn’t what was important. When an employer looks at your resume, she said, they will be looking to see what type of degree you got, but then they will look at all of the experiences you have had and what kind of person those experiences made you.

Experiences. These are the things that shape us, and the things that push life forward. And then, I realized everything changes. It’s how we react to those changes that make us who we are.

I realized that it is okay that I changed my mind. It is okay that I don’t want the same things that I wanted a few months ago, or even a few days ago. At the beginning of the year, I wrote a post called, “How to Deal with Change in the New Semester.” To me, it was about taking the time to recognize that life is always changing, and that while some things may hold constant, it’s important to embrace the things that don’t. I wanted to start the semester off with clear goals in mind, and do everything that I could to reach those goals. Little did I know, that part of this process is taking the time to reflect and make sure they are still things you that really want.

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