The Loneliest Party Host


In tenth grade I took American Lit. It was without a doubt, one of best classes I have ever taken, with one of the best teachers in the world (just about anyone who has had him as a teacher could attest to this). One of the first things we read was The Great Gatsby, and while unfortunately I was unable to attend our Gatsby-themed viewing party–being that I was in Fort Lauderdale, FL–it was one of my favorite units. It was my third attempt at Gatsby. I don’t know if it was because of the class, or that we were picking it apart to show the meaning, or maybe if it was just because of my age, but this time it really stuck with me. I couldn’t get the story out of my head. Suddenly, it wasn’t just a story about a crazy-rich guy doing stupid stuff for a married girl. It all made sense, and it was beautiful. Gatsby is actually kind of a crazy guy. And he is very rich. But knowing that there is so much to the story made it so much more interesting, and that is part of the reason I am so in love with literature: in life there is a whole other world if you keep digging below the surface.

One of our assignments involved writing a poem, and as I was searching for other files I came upon my poem from my sophomore year. Sometimes you don’t always find what you are looking for, and sometimes you find something that you weren’t looking for. The only way to find anything is with a curious mind and the will to keep looking.

From the Life in the Lost and Found Bin,
Always Keep searching.

The Loneliest Party Host

The little green light of your existence is all I have
Frivolous parties, with unsuspecting fools, are lonely without you
Waiting for the day when you will arrive
I am the loneliest party host

Five years and many parties later I do not surrender
The best, the richest, the finest for you
Anything to be near you again
Hoping you will wander near me one day
My parties invite the loneliest people
To join the loneliest host

Even in death I long for you
To my death I search for the time of yesterday
Letting you go never I will seek you still
My sweet flower will never escape my sight
In death, the green light shines brighter than ever before

Confusion hinders your judgment
So I wait
All night long outside your residence
Sweet flower I am here until day break
You will love me once more

Your whisper is all I hear
Before the never ending silence
The phone call I will never receive
Does not change the way we loved
For I will always see you now

And shall you have loved him
It is no matter now
As I know you have loved me
Never will I cease to watch
Green light or not

The last unknowing party guest lingers
Unaware the party has ended
The guests are gone
The party for you is over
But forever I remain the loneliest party host